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Nicolas94
Newbie
Posts: 8
Registered: 09-09-2008 Location:
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posted on 09-09-2008 at 20:09 |
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Guys who value a women based on her virginity.
I was browsing through this forum, and I saw several and ironically older males who repetively said there wife HAD to be a virgin.
Honestly I think these people are very foolish, im a teenage guy and the fact that these adult men value something SO trivial, reallllly bothers me.
On one hand I kind of know where there coming from, but still there taking it to an extreme.
If a girls a virgin when shes married, that can be both a good thing OR a bad thing. When I am with a girl I want her to feel as little pain as possible, and I would be a bit distraught if it was her first time since It would feel like I made her bleed, and I wouldny want her to associate me with that pain.
Of course id be gentle, and ask her if she wanted me to stop..but still it would hurt her.
I have nothing against marrying a virgin, I would marry anyone I was happy with and loved, but I dont think its as perfect and all around nessecary as some people make it out to be.
Also umm.. as a girl IF you marry someone without ever having sex, or being sexual with them..you dont really know them..
This is a hypothetical situation, but lets say your a virgin girl and marry a guy..then on the honeymoon you find out he has a 1 inch penis, granted you love him and hes nice, but STILL you know the sex is going to be well.. not really sex.
You can love someone with all your heart, but the sex can still be unfufilling.
I think the whole virginity thing is really up to the girl, if she wanted to have sex before marriage, better for both people in the relationship. They get to know eachother better, become closer to eachother and connect on a higher lvl, physically and emotionally.
On the opposite side of all of this, it would be kinda weird to marry a girl whos been with like..30 guys..that WOULD be kinda weird. But I still pity the guys who are "virgin hunters" so to speak.
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Blank_Wall
Member
Posts: 43
Registered: 02-09-2007 Location: Houston, TX
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posted on 09-19-2008 at 22:58 |
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Get a Clue, Kid
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'I was browsing through this forum, and I saw several and ironically older
males who repetively said there wife HAD to be a virgin.
Honestly I think these people are very foolish, im a teenage guy ...
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LOL
A clueless kid who believes that older people are “foolish”.
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... and the fact that these adult men value something SO trivial, reallllly bothers me.
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It’s trivial to YOU for whatever reason that you believe that it is.
The thing that is completely lost on you is that different people value
different things in different ways. That you yourself believe that virginity
is “trivial” is a valuation of your own choosing, but to state the opinion that
everyone else should hold that same value is presumptive arrogance, not to
mention simple mindedness - and being just plain clueless.
That you believe that there are no valid reasons to value virginity in a
potential relationship partner doesn’t mean that there are none - it just
means that those reasons have never occurred to you.
What you don’t understand is that, when you’re in a relationship with the
only person that you’ve ever had sex with, then the act of sex takes on
special meaning - it becomes a part of the bond within the relationship.
Get a clue - kid.
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On one hand I kind of know where there coming from, but still there taking
it to an extreme.
If a girls a virgin when shes married, that can be both a good thing OR
a bad thing. When I am with a girl I want her to feel as little pain as
possible, and I would be a bit distraught if it was her first time since
It would feel like I made her bleed, and I wouldny want her to associate
me with that pain.
Of course id be gentle, and ask her if she wanted me to stop..but still it
would hurt her.
I have nothing against marrying a virgin, I would marry anyone I was happy
with and loved, but I dont think its as perfect and all around nessecary
as some people make it out to be.
Also umm.. as a girl IF you marry someone without ever having sex,
or being sexual with them..you dont really know them..
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
What is there to know?
If sex is all that difficult for you to figure out, then you don’t have
a lot going for you upstairs - and you’re probably someone who shouldn’t
be involved in a relationship in the first place.
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This is a hypothetical situation, but lets say your a virgin girl and
marry a guy..then on the honeymoon you find out he has a 1 inch penis,
granted you love him and hes nice, but STILL you know the sex is going
to be well.. not really sex.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
This is where there needs to be honest communication - a frank discussion as
to what the expectations are with regards to sex - and the sort of problems
that might be encountered in the course of having sex.
You don’t need to actually have sex with someone to have an understanding
as to what the sexual aspects of a relationship might be like should the
relationship become a committed one.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
You can love someone with all your heart, but the sex can still be unfufilling.
I think the whole virginity thing is really up to the girl, if she wanted
to have sex before marriage, better for both people in the relationship.
They get to know eachother better, become closer to eachother and connect
on a higher lvl, physically and emotionally.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
... and they form a closer bond before a commitment is made.
... which compels them to make that commitment without performing an
objective evaluation of each other.
Sex can cloud people’s thinking, and lead them to make bad decisions that
they come to later regret.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
On the opposite side of all of this, it would be kinda weird to marry
a girl whos been with like..30 guys..that WOULD be kinda weird. But I
still pity the guys who are "virgin hunters" so to speak.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
... and I pity clueless kids who delude themselves into believing that
they are smarter than they actually are.
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Parthena
Member
Posts: 57
Registered: 07-07-2007 Location: Greece
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posted on 06-15-2009 at 02:36 |
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reply
'I was browsing through this forum, and I saw several and ironically older males who repetively said there wife HAD to be a virgin.
Honestly I think these people are very foolish, im a teenage guy and the fact that these adult men value something SO trivial, reallllly bothers me.
On one hand I kind of know where there coming from, but still there taking it to an extreme.
If a girls a virgin when shes married, that can be both a good thing OR a bad thing. When I am with a girl I want her to feel as little pain as possible, and I would be a bit distraught if it was her first time since It would feel like I made her bleed, and I wouldny want her to associate me with that pain.
Of course id be gentle, and ask her if she wanted me to stop..but still it would hurt her.
I have nothing against marrying a virgin, I would marry anyone I was happy with and loved, but I dont think its as perfect and all around nessecary as some people make it out to be.
Also umm.. as a girl IF you marry someone without ever having sex, or being sexual with them..you dont really know them..
This is a hypothetical situation, but lets say your a virgin girl and marry a guy..then on the honeymoon you find out he has a 1 inch penis, granted you love him and hes nice, but STILL you know the sex is going to be well.. not really sex.
You can love someone with all your heart, but the sex can still be unfufilling.
I think the whole virginity thing is really up to the girl, if she wanted to have sex before marriage, better for both people in the relationship. They get to know eachother better, become closer to eachother and connect on a higher lvl, physically and emotionally.
'
I agree with some of what you say. Some women are virgins when they get married but then their husband dies prematurely or cheats on them and leaves. These women need another chance because they didn't deserve what befell them and they deserve to have a family if they want it. They should not be judged by the fact they are no longer in possession of their virginity... Because there are 2 types of virgins, as I've stated somewhere else before: The first kind are the 'technical' virgins- women who have their hymen but their minds are polluted; the second kind are the 'true' virgins- women who, whether still in possession of an intact hymen or not, have clean MINDS and HEARTS, that is, they would be loyal, honest and good wives or life partners to their husbands and their PRIORITIES are in the right place. This second kind is the virgin you want. It is a woman who is after a strong lifetime relationship, not a prize for keeping her legs together. Some of my friends were virgins for ages (late 20s) and then got married, only to become more promiscuous than their non-virgin counterparts later on (and promiscuity can exist within a marriage, contrary to popular belief).
On the other hand however, you say some other things I don't agree with. You say a woman being a virgin when she's married can be a bad thing. I think this can only be so if she's with the wrong man. Sorry but I just can't imagine being a man in love with a fantastic woman who loves me and hating the fact that she has saved herself for me. I would feel fantastic, like a king, and the feeling wouldn't fade as our marriage progressed, unlike the few fleeting moments - or not - of pain she might experience on our first sexual encounter. Men need to just learn that there are ways to increase the likelihood that their woman enjoys the first time with them. You're not hacking into a piece of meat at the butcher's for crying out loud. You're becoming one with the person you've decided to spend your life with and bear offspring with! Her body is your body. Would you like someone to jam a hot poker into your dick? No! So f*****g show the same consideration in return!! 
And what you say about not really knowing a person you haven't slept with is bollocks, sorry. Assuming you've known your husband/wife for a good 2-3 years and become close enough for it to frigin count, you'll know PLENTY about them. And to this the sex will just add. Sex is just the cherry atop the cake of marriage. No cake is built on a foundation of flipping cherries! It needs that solid, doughy (boring) layer of bready stuff and the cream to glue it all together, and the cherry is meant as a decoration and finish it off. That's what I said, FINISH it! It's meant to come at the END of the love story, not the beginning. Anyone who disagrees with me here is just bitter, jealous and cynical. It's like saying that because you're fat, all slim and fit people are ugly or there's something wrong with them. No there isn't! They're happy, healthy people, it's YOU there's something wrong with! But there is always hope where there is love.
And to finish, it is highly unlikely that a mature couple will get to their wedding night before the woman finds out her partner has a one inch penis. And even if he does, so fucking WHAT?! There are QUADRI-FUCKING-PLEGICS who have better sex lives than most of the population because they're with someone they LOVE!!! Someone who COUNTS!!! Someone they waited for like an athlete waits for their moment on the podium. Have you ever heard an athlete say, "I'm not going to be an athlete anymore because on the day I win and stand to the strains of my national anthem, the fucking music over the loudspeakers might be off-TUNE!!! Or someone in the crowd might fucking BOOOO me!" You would think such a person a total LOSER and tell them to get a life! So should all sex addicts get a life and stop pestering people who go to a message board for SUPPORT. Go to fucking Chatropolis or some other hole to relieve yourselves and leave the virgins alone! They don't want your reeking bods anyway!
This was not to offend you in any way, it was a purely objective, general post. Hope you don't take it personally. :)
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